暮色-第34部分
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head; not sure if I could speak。 I could feel his gaze on my face; but I
kept my eyes forward。
〃Are you crying?〃 He sounded appalled。 I hadn't realized the moisture in
my eyes had brimmed over。 I quickly rubbed my hand across my cheek; and
sure enough; traitor tears were there; betraying me。
〃No;〃 I said; but my voice cracked。
I saw him reach toward me hesitantly with his right hand; but then he
stopped and placed it slowly back on the steering wheel。
〃I'm sorry。〃 His voice burned with regret。 I knew he wasn't just
apologizing for the words that had upset me。
The darkness slipped by us in silence。
〃Tell me something;〃 he asked after another minute; and I could hear him
struggle to use a lighter tone。
〃Yes?〃
〃What were you thinking tonight; just before I came around the corner? I
couldn't understand your expression — you didn't look that scared; you
looked like you were concentrating very hard on something。〃
〃I was trying to remember how to incapacitate an attacker — you know;
selfdefense。 I was going to smash his nose into his brain。〃 I thought of
the darkhaired man with a surge of hate。
〃You were going to fight them?〃 This upset him。 〃Didn't you think about
running?〃
〃I fall down a lot when I run;〃 I admitted。
〃What about screaming for help?〃
〃I was getting to that part。〃
He shook his head。 〃You were right — I'm definitely fighting fate trying
to keep you alive。〃
I sighed。 We were slowing; passing into the boundaries of Forks。 It had
taken less than twenty minutes。
〃Will I see you tomorrow?〃 I demanded。
〃Yes — I have a paper due; too。〃 He smiled。 〃I'll save you a seat at
lunch。〃
It was silly; after everything we'd been through tonight; how that little
promise sent flutters through my stomach; and made me unable to speak。
We were in front of Charlie's house。 The lights were on; my truck in its
place; everything utterly normal。 It was like waking from a dream。 He
stopped the car; but I didn't move。
〃Do you promise to be there tomorrow?〃
〃I promise。〃
I considered that for a moment; then nodded。 I pulled his jacket off;
taking one last whiff。
〃You can keep it — you don't have a jacket for tomorrow;〃 he reminded me。
I handed it back to him。 〃I don't want to have to explain to Charlie。〃
〃Oh; right。〃 He grinned。
I hesitated; my hand on the door handle; trying to prolong the moment。
〃Bella?〃 he asked in a different tone — serious; but hesitant。
〃Yes?〃 I turned back to him too eagerly。
〃Will you promise me something?〃
〃Yes;〃 I said; and instantly regretted my unconditional agreement。 What
if he asked me to stay away from him? I couldn't keep that promise。
〃Don't go into the woods alone。〃
I stared at him in blank confusion。 〃Why?〃
He frowned; and his eyes were tight as he stared past me out the window。
〃I'm not always the most dangerous thing out there。 Let's leave it at
that。〃
I shuddered slightly at the sudden bleakness in his voice; but I was
relieved。 This; at least; was an easy promise to honor。 〃Whatever you
say。〃
〃I'll see you tomorrow;〃 he sighed; and I knew he wanted me to leave now。
〃Tomorrow; then。〃 I opened the door unwillingly。
〃Bella?〃 I turned and he was leaning toward me; his pale; glorious face
just inches from mine。 My heart stopped beating。
〃Sleep well;〃 he said。 His breath blew in my face; stunning me。 It was
the same exquisite scent that clung to his jacket; but in a more
concentrated form。 I blinked; thoroughly dazed。 He leaned away。
I was unable to move until my brain had somewhat unscrambled itself。 Then
I stepped out of the car awkwardly; having to use the frame for support。
I thought I heard him chuckle; but the sound was too quiet for me to be
certain。
He waited till I had stumbled to the front door; and then I heard his
engine quietly rev。 I turned to watch the silver car disappear around the
corner。 I realized it was very cold。
I reached for the key mechanically; unlocked the door; and stepped inside。
Charlie called from the living room。 〃Bella?〃
〃Yeah; Dad; it's me。〃 I walked in to see him。 He was watching a baseball
game。
〃You're home early。〃
〃Am I?〃 I was surprised。
〃It's not even eight yet;〃 he told me。 〃Did you girls have fun?〃
〃Yeah — it was lots of fun。〃 My head was spinning as I tried to remember
all the way back to the girls' night out I had planned。 〃They both found
dresses。〃
〃Are you all right?〃
〃I'm just tired。 I did a lot of walking。〃
〃Well; maybe you should go lie down。〃 He sounded concerned。 I wondered
what my face looked like。
〃I'm just going to call Jessica first。〃
〃Weren't you just with her?〃 he asked; surprised。
〃Yes — but I left my jacket in her car。 I want to make sure she brings it
tomorrow。〃
〃Well; give her a chance to get home first。〃
〃Right;〃 I agreed。
I went to the kitchen and fell; exhausted; into a chair。 I was really
feeling dizzy now。 I wondered if I was going to go into shock after all。
Get a grip; I told myself。
The phone rang suddenly; startling me。 I yanked it off the hook。
〃Hello?〃 I asked breathlessly。
〃Bella?〃
〃Hey; Jess; I was just going to call you。〃
〃You made it home?〃 Her voice was relieved… and surprised。
〃Yes。 I left my jacket in your car — could you bring it to me tomorrow?〃
〃Sure。 But tell me what happened!〃 she demanded。
〃Um; tomorrow — in Trig; okay?〃
She caught on quickly。 〃Oh; is your dad there?〃
〃Yes; that's right。〃
〃Okay; I'll talk to you tomorrow; then。 Bye!〃 I could hear the impatience
in her voice。
〃Bye; Jess。〃
I walked up the stairs slowly; a heavy stupor clouding my mind。 I went
through the motions of getting ready for bed without paying any attention
to what I was doing。 It wasn't until I was in the shower — the water too
hot; burning my skin — that I realized I was freezing。 I shuddered
violently for several minutes before the steaming spray could finally
relax my rigid muscles。 Then I stood in the shower; too tired to move;
until the hot water began to run out。
I stumbled out; wrapping myself securely in a towel; trying to hold the
heat from the water in so the aching shivers wouldn't return。 I dressed
for bed swiftly and climbed under my quilt; curling into a ball; hugging
myself to keep warm。 A few small shudders trembled through me。
My mind still swirled dizzily; full of images I couldn't understand; and
some I fought to repress。 Nothing seemed clear at first; but as I fell
gradually closer to unconsciousness; a few certainties became evident。
About three things I was absolutely positive。 First; Edward was a
vampire。 Second; there was part of him — and I didn't know how potent
that part might be — that thirsted for my blood。 And third; I was
unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him。
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10。 INTERROGATIONS
It was very hard; in the morning; to argue with the part of me that was
sure last night was a dream。 Logic wasn't on my side; or mon sense。 I
clung to the parts I couldn't have imagined — like his smell。 I was sure
I could never have dreamed that up on my own。
It was foggy and dark outside my window; absolutely perfect。 He had no
reason not to be in school today。 I dressed in my heavy clothes;
remembering I didn't have a jacket。 Further proof that my memory was real。
When I got downstairs; Charlie was gone again — I was running later than
I'd realized。 I swallowed a granola bar in three bites; chased it down
with milk straight from the carton; and then hurried out the door。
Hopefully the rain would hold off until I could find Jessica。
It was unusually foggy; the air was almost smoky with it。 The mist was
ice cold where it clung to the exposed skin on my face and neck。 I
couldn't wait to get the heat going in my truck。 It was such a thick fog
that I was a few feet down the driveway before I realized there was a car
in it: a silver car。 My heart thudded; stuttered; and then picked up
again in double time。
I